Lamentations of the Flame Princess, reviewed

Mêlée Weapons:

Cestus, Garrote, Lance, Mancatcher, Polearm, Rapier, Spear, Staff, Weapon (Great, Medium, Minor, Small), Whip

Lamentations of the Flame Princess, Page 27

Defeating enemies is a minor way of gaining experience. This is not a game about combat or slaying foes; these activities are simply frequent necessities in the harsh reality of the game. Characters who prefer to fight when it is unnecessary are lunatics, possibly psychotic, and not likely to survive long in a game run by a competent Referee.

Lamentations of the Flame Princess, Page 33

Property

Owning property is a great way for characters to both spend, and invest, their wealth. The prices given for property in the Equipment section are averages; the Referee is of course free to create custom price lists for different locations and conditions. At the very least, a place to store excess treasure will be needed, as well as people to guard it and run things while the character is off adventuring.

Owning property also gives a character a stake in local politics and will lead to many NPCs becoming involved in the character’s life.

Note that for the purpose of these rules being a landowner does not imply rulership over anything other than the household staff. The complexities of being a political power are beyond the scope of these rules, which assume that the characters are explorers and adventurers.

Upkeep

It costs 1 gp (50 sp) per month for food and other essential supplies per resident of the household.

A landowning character must pay 1d6% of the property’s value every year just for simple maintenance. This is increased by 1d10% if there is no accountant on staff, and by another 1d4% if there is no handyman or craftsman on the payroll.

Taxes

A landowning character must pay 1d4+3% of the property’s value per year in taxes, adding another 1d10% if there is not an accountant on staff.

Investment

Another method of using (and hopefully growing!) wealth is investment. Merchant houses importing and exporting goods, explorers looking for sponsors for their latest expeditions, craftsmen looking for capital to open their own shop in town—all of these give a character opportunity to invest and earn a profit from his accumulated wealth.

These rules will be handled abstractly, unless the Referee wants to be specific. The player merely… (cont’d)

Lamentations of the Flame Princess, Page 53

FFS. I’m not saying there’s no market for this game, because apparently there is, but come on. Also, did I mention, Fighters of level 1 through 10 get a bonus to hit equal to their level (at which point it stops), but very other class is capped at +1 at first level?

Blech. “Accountants and Administrators”. No thank you.

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